Develop
a reflection blog describing how the MBTI might be useful to you as you develop
your leadership capacity. In your blog, touch on your own self-awareness and
also your knowledge and awareness of others.
I had originally taken the MBTI test earlier in the
program and had received results stating that I had an INFJ personality. I
decided to take the test again just to see if my feelings on any of the
questions the test provided had changed as it has been almost a year since
beginning the program and in my opinion a lot can happen in a year that can
change how people perceive things or certain situations, such as my
professional experiences, my marriage and the birth of my daughter. When I
retook the test, I did feel as though my answers to some questions had changed
but overall I felt I had provided enough feedback to receive the same results I
had received on the test the first time around. In my opinion I think that the test
had very accurate results of my personality.
The Myers Briggs test builds self awareness and emotional
intelligence and can be used to enhance and develop leadership skills, coaching
mechanisms and team building strategies. I think the MBTI will be useful to me
as I progress through my career and whatever leadership roles I may hold in the
future because it makes me aware of my personality traits and characteristics
so I always have a reminder in how I perceive certain situations. I believe
that to some extent I have always been self aware of others emotions. However,
as I got older I realized that in a work environment, it is that much more
difficult to recognize others emotions as many individuals do a good job in
hiding their true feelings in a professional environment. Once I became
employed in my first official office job as a file clerk, I began to truly tap
into the emotional intelligence of others. The non verbal cues of stress,
anger, and frustration of my co workers were at times very hard to recognize as
I could tell many of them were trying very hard to hide their sentiments. I
began to observe my coworkers and noticed that if I looked closely enough,
their emotions were written all over their face passed the forced smiles and
kind words they projected.
My whole life everyone has told me that I wear my heart
on my sleeve. It didn’t matter how much I tried to hide my emotions, people
knew how I felt by just taking one look at my face. This didn’t help me much
considering there were times when I didn’t want others to know how I was
feeling or how my day was going because it wasn’t going well. As I continued to
hold other jobs, I did my best to become a bit better at hiding my emotions and
refraining from being too outwardly emotional. I thought I was doing a great
job at achieving this until my current position. One month a year every
department’s manager holds an evaluation with each member of their staff. This
year’s evaluation went well for me; however my manager did have one minor
suggestion. He stated that I needed to be a bit more conscious of my facial
expressions in the work environment. I was blown away! I couldn’t believe I was
hearing this. Just as I thought I had mastered the art of self awareness, I was
being told I needed to work on it. I couldn’t imagine what was different this year
than last. Then it hit me. I had been pregnant this year.
Looking back, I didn’t realize how my actions and
personality had changed during my pregnancy. I felt I had done fairly well with
the mood changes and felt I had even become less vocal on opinions as I knew my
mood might alter them. I asked my boss to elaborate on his suggestion. He
stated that because he knew me personally he understood that my facial
expressions were not negative and that he understood during those times, I was
working really hard or concentrating on a project or other work related tasks,
however he informed me that those around me who do not know me as well as he
did could possibly take my facial expressions in a negative manner as I could
sometimes appear angry instead of concentrated. The goal he provided to me for next year’s
evaluation was to work on my self awareness and awareness of others. When I
thought about what my boss said, I felt a bit bad for giving off the wrong
impression to my colleagues even during my pregnancy. It was clear I did not
have as much control over my emotions as I thought during this time and in
turn, self awareness of myself and awareness of others had become nonexistent.
I was so in tune with my own feelings of being sick and tired and overwhelmed
with what the future of motherhood had to hold, that I had completely lost all sense
of my surroundings and the people in them.
I took what my boss told me seriously and told myself
that I was going to work hard on not letting my personal experiences and life
interfere with my professional environment. Toward the end of the pregnancy, I
could already see and feel a change in the way I was acting and how I was
handling my interactions with others. I must admit, some days were difficult,
but I had to remind myself to always be conscious of how I was dealing with
others and handling difficult situations in my place of work on top of the
emotions and changes I was experiencing in my personal life. It has been five
months since I have had my daughter and I have recognized the importance of
maintaining self awareness and awareness of others in a major way. However,
while it was my duty to ensure that I was able to be aware of myself and my
actions, I can’t help but feel as though, some of my colleagues needed to work
on their own emotional intelligence and consider that my dispositions at that
time stemmed from my pregnancy and nothing more. I believe even veteran mothers
sometimes forget the difficulties of pregnancy and how it can change someone’s
mood. In my personal opinion the men I worked with were more understanding and
emotionally aware of my changes than many of the women in my workplace. They
did not seem to take my changes in mood and energy toward them personally.
Either way I am grateful that my boss informed me of the energy I was giving
off and how that energy was being perceived by other people. I am glad I was
able to listen to what he had to say, take note, and be able to make some positive
changes. Our conversation has made me fully aware of preventing misunderstandings
or preconceived notions all stemming from ensuring my own self awareness and
that of others.
Cassandra R.
